Last week, I chatted about writing with a marketing director from Wisconsin. She writes for brochures, the company website and marketing emails. Her topic is always given to her. When I told her I write a weekly column her immediate question was, “How do you know what to write about?” I replied, “That is a great question. I try to think about those reading the column and ask God to provide something helpful to at least one of them.”
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Last week I read this quote from Jon Gordon, “We don’t get burned out because of what we do. We get burned out because we forget why we do it. Purpose keeps you fresh!” The next day I received an email reminding me why I am a pastor and why I write this column. I don’t do so to push my agenda or opinion, but to help people.
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Do you ever struggle with personal doubts? I don’t see my marriage making it. I doubt I will ever make it through algebra. I would love to spend more time with my grandkids. but I don’t think I will ever get that chance. I doubt that I am ever going to overcome this addiction. When I retire I don’t know that I will have any purpose in life. I don’t think I’m ever going to be able to lose weight and keep it off. I can’t get over this hurt and it eats away at me day after day. I feel like hope and joy is slowly and consistently being drained from me.
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In 1990, the popular hair band, Poison, released a power ballad that is widely known yet today. The song, “Something to Believe In,” raises a dilemma that we all struggle with. The reality of our world and our personal lives is that there is darkness. As the song lyrics indicate, there are pastors and leaders who take advantage of their power and fail the very people they are blessed to lead. There is depression and suicide; anger and addiction; death and divorce; loneliness and financial hardship.
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I am so blessed and thankful to have grown up in North Dakota. The people of the upper Midwest have a strong work ethic with a tough and rugged determination. My son, while at boot camp for the U.S. Army, discovered that not everyone has the same determination and commitment that we learn in this part of the country.
If you grew up in this region, you also learned that the answer to every problem is the same: suck it up, work harder and get over it. And if that doesn’t work, drink the problem away. What you don’t do is let anyone know you have a problem. You do what you have to do and plow your way through it. And when you don’t reveal it to another person, you don’t admit it to yourself or to God. But I’ve discovered it’s really tough to live in isolation, hiding that problem when it simply does not, will not, get better.
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I used to think that a great teacher always had great answers. Now I realize that a great teacher is someone who asks great questions. The right question at the right time makes all the difference in helping people grow.
I used to think as a leader I had to have all the answers. Now I realize my job as a leader is to ask great questions. Management expert Peter Drucker said, “My greatest strength as a consultant is to be ignorant and ask a few questions.” The right question at the right time makes all the difference in helping an organization make progress.
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Full of questions, doubts and fears for Dad’s future, I have watched eight children come together unlike they ever have before, sharing memories, asking how each other are doing, caring for each other and discussing every topic under the sun.
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Addiction is a complex issue but there is hope. A humble, spiritually hungry, courageous heart is needed. A community of faith where we share our stories and build authentic relationships is needed.
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